- "I love my wife, she loves me," he thought. - "We dreamed of children, we made plans," he continued to remember. - And after the wedding ... a child was born, which was so desirable, but I retreated into the background, the requirements to me became sharper, I began not to like it in some way ... - "And it seemed to me that she would not notice how I would leave her ..."
In the family we are born and sooner or later we create our own family. That's why the family is one of the most important values of life, and whatever they say, it’s the most important. Without it, the successes in professional activity, interesting work, material well-being, all are taking second place.
Why do some marriages turn out to be happy, while others do not, no one really knows. Of course, many consider themselves to be experts and are ready to discuss this topic. After all, family and family life are so interesting. Maybe it's more exciting than football?
So many books were written, and so many movies were made about it. But didn’t you get the impression that when people get married, they take on such a thing, which they do not know at all?
So, they have their second attempt, and maybe a third ... but, I dare to say, they know about the topic of family no more than the first time.
Many people do not tire of repeating that mutual attraction and love are important conditions for a successful marriage. Yes, and I will repeat it, that this is a necessary condition for happiness in marriage. But emotional attraction cannot be called love.
Indeed, when there is love and care in the family, then children grow up in such a family as confident and self-sufficient people.
One who has been surrounded by care from childhood, learns the language of love and is ready to love and accept love.
Love is not just for children. This need lives in us, and when we grew up and when we married. We fall in love because we need love. It will be necessary to us all life, because without it human happiness and the birth of life are impossible.
But in marriage, we need to feel the love of a partner, get stroking, as Eric Berne said. In a harmonious, functional family, a special atmosphere of intimacy and emotional intimacy is created.
But all the same, what in our being craves the love of another person?
Why is loneliness destructive for the human psyche?
After all, a solitary confinement for a criminal is the most severe punishment. And we voluntarily or by force of circumstances doom ourselves to loneliness in the crowd. And how do you find your "half" in this world?
Little by little, the sense of closeness disappears, giving way to ordinary bachelor behavior. There are desires, emotions and thoughts that are not associated with a partner.
They are already two different people and they think differently. And it seems to them now that, they, only for a short time, united under the power of passion accepted as Love.
And the reality is actually farther and farther away. And now they are no longer in love. Now they can surrender and disperse. And go in search of a new love.